I have often wondered if any serious physiological studies have been conducted on the age group of humans known as "Toddlers". They are a group unto themselves. Their way of communicating, interacting, and thinking can be quite bewildering.
I do not think that they are the innocent little beings that they would pass themselves off as.
I have noticed that only moms ( and occasionally primary workers who have been tragically left in nursery too long), can get a look into their world. A few months ago I came face to face with the world of two year old. I think that I am scarred for life.
It stated out rather mundane. I volunteered, or I was voluntold, I forget which, to keep Liam and his best friend Amber Matson, while their mothers were out doing something. I rather foolishly thought that there could not be much trouble. After all, that Amber has the most winning smile.
I don't remember what I was doing at the time. I knew that Liam and Amber were upstairs playing quietly. I guess that should of been my biggest clue that things were going very wrong. I had the impression that I should go and check on them. I unwisely decided that there was not much that they could get into. By the time I realized my mistake, my day had taken a big hit, and two innocent guinea pigs would never be the same.
The Day the Guinea Pigs Cried!
I don't remember just what caught my attention to the front hall. Looking back, I believe it was the soft laughter, like maybe Leprechauns make. I went into the front hallway, and there they stood, hand in hand and smiling. It was kind of like they were going on stage to accept an award.
What caught my eye was what was behind them. A trail of guinea pig poop, shredded paper, held together by guinea Pig urine. It was like some type of demonic yellow brick road, leading up the stairs into the upper bedrooms. I didn't think that Cailin used so much paper for the guinea pigs. Come to think of it, I didn't know that guinea pigs could eat so much.
It took me a lot of time to get things cleaned up. It was the guinea pigs that suffered the most. Little did I understand the trauma they underwent as the toddlers reached into the cage and pulled out all of the...................stuff. I think that the only thing that saved them from leaving the cage was the plastic bottom.
Anyway, the poor things had burrowed down as much as they could to escape the little hands. It took several nights of intense negotiations by the County Hostage Rescue Teams for them to surface at least long enough to determine that they were still in the cage. The poor little things, to this day, when they hear Liam's voice, they just fall apart. It is a heart wrenching thing to see ginny pigs have nervous breakdowns.
I thought that I had the perfect punishment for them. I put them down for a nap. Oh yeah, I showed them-- when they woke up it was too late for me to realized that I had just given them a chance to recharge.
You may ask what all of this had to do with Peanut Butter, well, Liam loves the stuff. He could eat his weight in it. There are times that you ask him a question, and instead of answering you, with a glint in his eye and a cheesey smile he says,"Peanut Butter". At this point he usually laughs and thinks that he is so funny. You may think that it is only toddler nonsense, but I think it is some type of code.
Lunch at Macado's
