Ryan's quarterly school update

Ryan's still going strong with his college classes at New River Community College.  He's taking his 2nd semester of Calculus.  This semester his teacher is Dr. Chalmeta.   Last semester, Dr. Chalmeta substituted for Mr. Coake.  Ryan had a difficult time understanding everything Mr. Coake would say.  This one day he came home quite happy.  He said  "Oh I get it, the substitute really helped me understand."  He didn't remember the name of the sub, so when he came home from his first day of class this semester, I asked him who his teacher was and he said "it's the substitute."  He was excited and so was I.  Both, Dr. Chalmeta and Mr. Coake have been good at being available to help Ryan with questions.  This semester has been hard for him, but he's not giving up.  He's had a rough start, his first test was a D....yikes, but I think he'll pull through.

The other class he's taking is  Computer Programming using C++.  Here again, he's had a rough start, the first test was a C, however, his tenacious spirit is prevailing.  After his first day of class, I was quite concerned that he wasn't ready...or even that computer programming wasn't the path Ryan should be on.  However, after a prayer, I felt very peaceful that all would be well.  Of course, I've come to know that "all will be well" is quite liberal of an answer and that it doesn't mean there will be changes to come in the future, but for now, continuing on with this class was the right thing to do.
He struggled quite a bit with figuring out how to write a program that would work, but after 8 or so weeks I hear much less crying and hitting of his head on the desk when he was stuck and more "yeah baby, I got it on the first try!"  Because he's never taken any computer programming classes before (not from the lack of trying on my part), he's had quite a hill to climb in learning so much--the grammar and the functions of programming.  But he's doing it!

 Ryan had decided that he,indeed, wants to become an eagle scout.  Barry and I have been gently pushing him toward this goal, but it wasn't until he decided that he doesn't want to be left behind from his two cousins, Cory and Josh, that he's made the commitment.   He has chosen to make grow boxes similar to these. (Cory made these particular one for his project.)

He and Barry pulled all the paper work together.  Then Ryan set the date for meeting with the district level person that would approve the project.  He went, he presented, and came away with the 'go ahead' for the project.

He is now in the process of fund raising.  On the 26th of March he will be having a fund raising event at Cici's Pizza in Christainsburg.  Hopefully many will turn out and he'll get all the money he needs for the project  (about $500.00) so he won't have to plan another one.  So many people have been  generous and have just given him donations.

Ryan still loves to read....many of the books he's read lay around his room, unless he's
 checked them out of the library. 

 Following the TJEd principles, especially the 'inspire, not require'  is hard for me.  For so long, I always pacified myself with the fact that Ryan's Asperger's would keep me from it.  And, in some ways in the past it did.  However, I'm finding that now that he has a goal and a desire to become someone great, of leading a purposeful life, one with meaning, that inspiring him actually has merit.

The quest has now been how. How do I help him realize that he needs to take on the hard challenge of learning how to write well or any other such task that he really doesn't want to do?
One night I picked up the Nov. issue of the Ensign and the talk by Sister Barbra Thompson open up and I started reading it.....a tender mercy fell into my lap.
Here is what she had to say:

Several years ago I visited some dear friends in London, England. During this visit I traveled on the tube—a subway system of underground trains that people use frequently to get from place to place. In each of these busy subway stations, there are warning signs about dangers that people may encounter. Lights flash on and off to notify people that a train is approaching and they need to stand back. There is also a sign to remind people that there is danger—a gap between the train and the station platform. The sign says, “Mind the Gap.” This reminds people not to let their foot get caught in the gap and not to drop anything in the gap because it will go under the train and be lost. The caution sign is needed and warns people of a very real danger. In order to be safe, people must “mind the gap.”

Many of us have gaps in our own lives. Sometimes it is the difference between what we know and what we actually do or the gap between our goals and what we actually accomplish. These gaps can be reminders of ways in which we can improve or, if ignored, can be stumbling blocks in our lives.

I shared this with Ryan.  He cautiously said, "why are you sharing this with me?  Have I done something wrong?"    I assured him he hadn't and then we talked about his goals in life...his hopes and dreams.  He wants to serve a mission and get a degree in college in computer game programming and then he wants to get a good job as a game designer.  I asked him what he thought he needed to do to prepare for each of these things....and we talked some more.  I told him that he will need to take some classes at NRCC in English and that I thought what we had been doing thus far for his writing wasn't enough.  To my amazement, he agreed.  I then shared with him a catalog from Institute for Excellence in Writing that had recently come in the mail.  We've used this program before and it's wonderful.  We were introduced to with with CC and his only year with CC kinda killed his love of writing, (if is was ever there,) anyhow.....he found a class/ book/program that was interesting to him--History from the Civil War to present--and now we are working our way through it.

I'm proud of him for taking this on.  He's still not thrilled but he knows it will be beneficial for him and he's doing it!

Here's one of his first writing assignment:

Ryan Hale                                                                                                                   2/21/13

Slavery

The Slave

Depressed, Despairing
Laboring and plotting

Suffering people of life

Despicable

       Slavery goes against the ideals and virtues of the Constitution, however it existed for over two centuries. The history of slavery goes deep into the past of the New World. In between 1500 and 1800, over twelve million slaves were brought to the New World, which became known as North and South America. They were brought in overcrowded ships on voyages that lasted three dull, colorless months and ended with one-sixth of the people quietly dying. The first slaves were carried over to Jamestown, Virginia, which began slaver in the U.S. Slavery swept across the South, because huge tobacco and cotton plantations needed many laborers. Unfortunately for slaves, the invention of the cotton gin, which made cleaning cotton easier, need tons of slaves to work it. Farmers brought in more money so they planted larger fields and increased slavery. Slavery continuously increased, so that by 1860 slaves numbered about one-third of the population of the south, which was four million. Slavery became a way of life in the South.

          The life of a slave was abominable. Most slaves were forced to work in fields in all kinds of conditions. If they stopped working their masters or overseers maliciously punished them. Other slaves worked as servants in the masters’ houses and they tried being apathetic about the field slaves’ punishments. A few house slaves learned precious crafts that let them work in a city. However all slaves had no freedom, couldn’t choose where they lived or worked, and they received no pay or education. They were treated like animals and punished for no reason. The slaves’ largest fear was the auction block where they were sold and families were torn apart. Slavery resulted in slaves having no control over their lives. We must uphold the ideals and virtues of the constitution to make sure nothing as despicable as slavery happens again.

                                                                  

He still quite the reader....he loves to read.  I have him read classics that he's chosen but his preferred topic to read is still about dragons.  He's probably read his Temraire books for , oh, maybe 20 times now.

Books he's read this year:

The Kite Runner

My Father's Dragon

Many books from Issac Asimov

Three Men in a Boat

The Lonesome Gods by Laous L'Amore

Here There Be Dragons

The Cross and the Switchblade

The Screwtape Letters

....plus a zillion books about dragons and other fantasy themed books that he get from the library.

He meets twice a month with Mr. Bryant, his counselor.  He enjoys his time with him.  He's happy that Mr. Bryant has helped him stop being obsessed with sticky hands.

He's also started going to Dublin Fitness, (by his own choice!) with Barry and Connor.  He still loves to dance with Just Dance on the Wii.

At church he has the calling of 1st counselor in the Priest Quorum.  He had to attend a planning meeting at Bishop Becker's home on Friday.  He. did. not. want. to. GO!   My, was he upset and complained about the whole thing.  I dropped him off and worried about what a pill he would be for everyone there.   

I need not worry.....I talked with Julie Morgan the day after and she told me what a delight he was.  He was kind, participated, talked and even came up with a great activity--he mentioned that he wanted to better understand the Isaiah chapters in 2Nephi.   After everyone, picked up their jaws off the floor, they considered it, and thought a fun activity learning about them would be fun.  I'll be interested in seeing how that comes together.  He even flattered Ss. Becker with his comments on what a lovely dinner she made, and how she had 'out done herself' with the brownies.  What a charmer!

Once again, I've come to realize how I worry too much about him, and how he'll do great in life.  He'll have challenges, for sure, but don't we all?  His only disability will be what he makes of it. Asperger traits can be challenge to work through, but according to the scriptures:  "our weaknesses will become our strengths."